


The Music Meme- Sparley Edition!

by nevercomestheday



Category: Chris Farley - Fandom, David Spade - Fandom, Saturday Night Live RPF
Genre: Admiration, Ambiguous Relationships, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Jealousy, Love, M/M, Past Character Death, Secret Crush, Slash, Soul-Crushing, Unspoken Bond, Workplace Relationship, music meme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-30
Updated: 2015-09-29
Packaged: 2018-04-24 02:04:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 2,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4901341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nevercomestheday/pseuds/nevercomestheday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the music meme- put your playlist on shuffle, start writing when the song begins, stop when it ends. <br/>These are all Sparley ficlets, each inspired by the mood/theme/lyrics of a song.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Song: Universally Speaking by The Red Hot Chili Peppers

**Author's Note:**

> I just wish I could've broken out of the "realistic" sort of box I'm always stuck in with this pairing. I guess I just like being able to believe these. *shrug*  
> RPF Disclaimer: I don't own these people or their lives, this is a work of pure fiction, and I make no assumptions, assertions, or accusations regarding anyone's sexuality.
> 
> Enjoy! <3

Chris comes barreling offstage, sweat on his brow and hair a mess. He's sustained a scrape on his cheek and his clothes are torn.

He's never looked more elegant, and he's never looked so happy.

"Davey!" he exclaims, rushing over to where David is waiting. He scoops him up in a hug and spins him around, pushing all the air out of David's lungs.

He was already breathless anyway.

Chris puts him down and looks at him, smile wide and blue eyes shining brightly. "How'd I do? Was I funny?"

David can't help but chuckle. "Chris, you're never _not_ funny."

He takes a second to take in the situation. That was Chris's last sketch of the night, so the few moments they have to spare before the goodnights are able to be spent doing David's favorite kind of nothing. The adrenaline is still roaring through Chris's veins, and though everyone in the room wants to talk to him, wants to have a piece of him for just a minute, he's giving all his attention to David.

It may be the same as every week, but it never fails to bewilder David. Why him, of all people, he'll never know.

"Come on, Dave, let's go get ready for goodnights," Chris says, and David just smiles.

 


	2. Song: Can't Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon

David hates these sorts of events, hates the photos and the crowds and the uncomfortable stares. He's never done so well with this part of working on television, and yet, right now, here, standing in the middle of a sea of photographers and reporters calling his name, there's no place he'd rather be.

Next to Chris.

The air is thick and humid, his eyes hurt from the flash, his feet are sore from standing. He could spend a week listing all the complaints tonight's premiere has thrown at him- that is, if he ever gets around to noticing any of them.

Chris's arm is wrapped protectively around his shoulder like it belongs there, and if anyone tried to tell him it doesn't, David wouldn't hear it.

Why doesn't he just tell him? It's not like it isn't obvious. People have started to comment that David looks uncomfortable and out of place at these events, except when Chris is along. He's honestly surprised it took them so long, and even more surprised no one mentioned that neither he nor Chris ever bring dates to these things.

He jokes about it constantly, but then, so does Chris. Why doesn't he say something? Some days he forgets, gets so comfortable sitting in the warm space next to Chris that he can't see why telling him would be so bad.

Then, other times, he's reminded. Someone makes a comment and Chris gets defensive, or someone makes a gay joke and it comes back around. Even if the whole world didn't approve, or had an issue, or whatever, the only thing David is truly afraid of is losing Chris altogether.

But the pull to be honest is so strong, and all the signals are there. Chris may be an open book with most people, but he shows even his back pages to David. There's nothing they don't share, no moment too private or secret too big.

Well, except one.

Maybe he'll let go some other time. For now, the cameras are too close.

 


	3. Song: Scar Tissue by The Red Hot Chili Peppers

What goes up must come down, and Chris's ups are sky high, so it only makes sense that his downs are underground.

David tries, he really does. He tries to understand, tries to cut back on the snide comments and sarcasm, but it's hard. It's hard to get addiction and relapse for someone who's never experienced it before.

Chris just wishes David could see how hard he's trying. He wants to get under control, he does.

"Honest, Dave, I'm _trying_. I'm trying so hard."

He tries to spend more time with David, because it's harder to use in front of him. It's painful to let someone you care about so much see you crash and burn.

It doesn't always work, though, and he finds himself stashing bags of drugs David's never even heard of in their shared office.

Chris can't figure out how to talk to anyone about it, so he bottles it up.

Looks of concern soon turn to looks of disappointment.

"Really? In our office?!" David cries. "How could you?"

"Fuck you! Go away!" Chris can't believe he just said that to David, of all people.

He's been sobbing for hours and he's sure the whole floor can hear him.

"I'm telling Marci," Sandler threatens.

"Fuck off!"

Marci Klein walks in, face made of icy stone.

"I'm telling Lorne."


	4. Song: Linger by The Cranberries

David sees the photo and finds a lump in his throat.

"You... you went out on a date?" he asks later, voice so low he can hardly hear himself.

Chris doesn't respond, because why should he have to? It's not like they've ever labeled anything, ever called out whatever's going on.

But they didn't exactly _not_ label it, either. The strange, tiptoed-around, unspoken agreement between them has always carried a clause of exclusivity, of mutual respect. What could have possibly happened?

"Yeah, Dave, I did. A couple, actually."

His whole body is on fire, the room is spinning, why can't he breathe? David's lip is probably bleeding from how hard he's biting it.

_But we promised, but we always said no, but we always stuck together, you said so yourself, you never wanted to be anywhere else when you were with me!_

"When?" _Don't cry, David, don't you fucking dare._

"Past month or so. But, uh... Dave..." His eyes are pleading.

_I can't believe I'm going to forgive him. Son of a bitch. Just let me go already._

"What?"

"You know none of that... I mean... None of it means anything. Please don't leave me."

 _Leave_ me _? You're asking_ me _not to leave_ you _? Are you kidding me? I should never speak to you again, son of a bitch, son of a bitch, son of a mother fucking..._

"Does it look like I'm going anywhere?"


	5. Song: Super Trouper by ABBA

It's been almost a year since Chris left SNL. Has it really been that long?

He'd never admit it out loud, but David's starting to regret staying on. Doing the show just isn't as fun without Chris, and being a senior among so many freshmen isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Sure, Tim Meadows is still there, and Norm Macdonald stuck around. Fred Wolf is still around as a writer with a new performance credit, and Mark McKinney stayed on from last year, but David doesn't know him so well and he only came on in January.

Even if the whole cast David came on with had stayed, none of it would matter unless Chris was there, too.

But tonight, David has an extra spring in his step. For the first time in far too long, he's looking forward to the show. He's excited.

Chris is coming on to plug their latest movie together, Black Sheep.

David even made a point to put in some appropriate music to start and end the Spade in America segment Chris is slated to crash.

It almost makes David wish he did more on the show.

Reunited by Peaches and Herb plays, and for once, David is smiling genuinely at the beginning of his segment.

In comes Chris, dressed as Newt Gingrich. He plays the bit out so well, and they fall right back into their old routine of Chris making a joke and grabbing David and pulling him close, and David trying desperately not to stare at Chris's blinding smile.

The whole experience really makes David think about his place on the show. The incredible difference between his usual near boredom and tonight's fire brings about the almost sad realization that he's done with Saturday Night Live.

Without Chris, though, he hasn't really been performing like himself. He's sure it's obvious.

Being here with Chris again, live on stage in front of a very pleased audience, he feels that spark he's missed so much. David's stomach is abuzz with butterflies and he's laughing, he's actually laughing.

Lorne hates it when the cast breaks- "This isn't the Carol Burnett Show-" but David doesn't care tonight. He's _alive_.

Right Back Where We Started From by Maxine Nightingale plays them out as David rushes up to Chris and, for once, is the one to initiate the hug.

He's pretty sure he's squeezing Chris about as hard as he's being squeezed this time.


	6. Song: Run To You by Bryan Adams

David goes on lots of dates. None of them really go anywhere, sure, but he goes on a lot of them, so that must mean something... right?

He never goes home with girls anymore. It's not that he doesn't get offers. He does. He just hasn't found anyone worth a whole night yet.

In fact, more and more often, he finds himself calling Chris once he gets home from these dinners to see if he's free to hang out.

He always is.

The girls David meets are so nice, and most of them are mind-blowingly gorgeous. Since joining the show, he's met more models than he can remember.

Maybe that's the problem- he can't remember.

They all start to blend together, long eyelashes and shiny hair and tight outfits all swirling together in his mind. He finds himself talking about work on every date.

"Hey, are you doing anything?"

"Nah, you should come by."

Chris never brings up David's dates. He never says anything about the connection, how it seems every time David says he has a date for the night, he calls.

Chris is just there, door open and arms awaiting another hug that's just a bit too tight for David's little frame.

They talk, they watch movies, sometimes they do nothing at all. Staring at the wall with Chris is more entertaining than a million conversations with the models he's met.

And every once in a while, David will spend the night on Chris's couch, head leaning on Chris's shoulder.


	7. Song: Call Me Back Again by Wings

The little red light on David's answering machine has been blinking for a month now. The tape is full, but he wouldn't dare erase a second of it.

The clock, the calendar, the newspapers, the TV- everything is reminding him angrily that it's been a month since Chris passed away.

A month.

David still calls the number. He doesn't want to think about why. Every night, he dials Chris's number, and every night, he listens to the outgoing message that he's surprised is still up.

"Hey, you've reached Chris Farley! I'm not in at the moment, so leave a message after the tone or you won't amount to JACK SQUAT! I'll call you back!"

Every week, sometimes every day, he used to call Chris. Sometimes to leave stupid messages, sometimes to talk for way too long, sometimes just to say hello.

Then Chris relapsed, and David still called, just not as often. By the third rehab stint, neither called each other.

The week it happened, Chris had left a couple of messages for David while he was out taping _Just Shoot Me!_.

By the time David got them, it was too late, and Chris was gone.

 _It's not fair_ , David thinks. _It's not fair. I wasn't home. I didn't see you called. I would've answered, I would've called, I would've done anything to help you._

Tears stream down his face for the millionth time, moving down the paths they're practically carving out into his skin.

_Please, just give me another chance. I didn't hear! I wasn't there! Please, come back, call me back again, I promise I'll answer! I'll never miss another call from you! I'll never not be there when you need me! Please! Please, God, please!_

He knows nothing will happen, though, no matter how he wishes, no matter how much he begs.

David wakes up in the middle of every night, sobbing Chris's name and clutching his pillowcase in desperation.

He still hasn't listened to Chris's messages all the way through. He just can't.

"I'll call you back!"


	8. Song: Letting Go by Wings

 He's sunshine. That's the only way to put it. Chris Farley is a ray of sunshine.

David's sure there's some metaphor here about Icarus and flying too close to the sun, but he can't pry himself away. Chris's presence is intoxicating, and he always makes David feel more important and special than he knows he is.

When they're together, David's not afraid of anything. His world is open and new and everything is beautiful because Chris is there to make it exciting. His optimism and excitement are contagious. Even David's hard-shelled cynicism doesn't stand a chance against Chris's smiling face.

Around Chris, David just exists. He lets himself go and allows himself to be. No one would dare criticize him in front of Chris; even they know Chris would defend David to the bitter end.

That's the thing David doesn't get. Why would this incredible, charismatic, talented person even look twice at David? Some days he's not even sure why people keep hiring him, but Chris looks at him and sees something great.

Chris looks at David and sees the same sunshine David sees in him.

 

 


	9. Song: Don't Talk (Put Your Head On My Shoulder) by The Beach Boys

It's been a long night.

It has to be close to four in the morning, but Sandler and Rock just now went down to get something to eat.

The office is empty. David is exhausted; Chris has dark circles under his eyes.

If you ask either man who started it first, they wouldn't remember, but at some point, an argument breaks out.

The fire burns out as quickly as it started, and soon Chris's arms are open and he's not saying a word.

David just collapses into the hug. There are a million things he wants to say, but he doesn't dare break the silence and potentially disturb the peace.

He just buries his face into Chris's shoulder, breathing deeply and closing his eyes. The world around them melts away like a surrealist painting, and the only noise in the room is the slow sound of their breath.

Chris takes his hand to the back of David's head and strokes his hair gently.

For just that one moment, the craziness- of their lives, their jobs, their worlds- all disappears. Everything is warm and safe, and David feels grounded, even on the seventeenth floor.

It feels like forever and a second all at once, and years later, when David is alone and Chris is gone, the memory sticks with him.

Not a moment goes by that he doesn't long for their forever again.


End file.
